guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize