have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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