I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
