what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
