Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize
