Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
