Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
