and next time when you feel me up, do it right
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
