I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
