if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Couch. On fire.
Randomize
