He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
