Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
