the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Randomize
