i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Randomize
