your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
