well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
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