Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
