How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
My cat gives me a boner
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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