I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
