she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Randomize