I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Randomize
