everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
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