her vagine was all disorganized.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Dicks are not precious.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize