Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
