no, he came in my armpit
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
