she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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