How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize