Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize
