They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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