i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
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