We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Randomize
