your thong is hanging out like whoa
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
What a dumb baby whore.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
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