God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
The beers last night were like the tears from god
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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