nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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