I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
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