fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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