Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
you never un-have a 4some
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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