Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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