U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
We named our party play list daddy issues
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
