2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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