I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
She even gives head with a lisp.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Randomize
