He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
