why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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