no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize