member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Randomize
