When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
