Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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