I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
You have to summon your inner elephant
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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