What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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