walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
